Adjustments

I'm starting the part of my life where I will have to learn to live on my own again. I've been so used to having Brett in my daily life that I can't imagine how I will be without him. I must stay strong because I know he's doing his best too. So begins my journal where I will talk about how it is to be a submarine wife/fiance. I've been trying to stay busy so I don't feel so lonesome but our house is so big so it just feels emptier. I really can't wait to be back in CA next week so I will have more distractions and even better, be doing real wedding planning. I wish time can fast forward and he'll be back and we can get married! Today has been tough. I started reading old emails we exchanged while he was at OCS and it was so bittersweet. And I also found some emails between my mom and I. That of course just triggered the tears. I lost the one person in my life that loves me the most and now the only other person that loves me is away for an extended period of time. I really need to stay busy and not let emotions get to me. (sigh)